Put Fear Behind Instead Of In Front Of You

I would like to share a very powerful exercise on reframing fear. As I say, fear is “imaginary” until it appears and paralizes you. It can, and often does, happen to everyone at one point or another.

Now, for most, fear is something that looms ahead that is the “scary boogieman” that stops you from doing somethig. We all felt it. But, what “if” you take that fear of not doing the thing you are scared off and imagine the worst case scenario if you do NOT do it.

Let’s say, you’re afraid of joining the gym because you are afraid of commitment of going regularly, having to change your lifestyle, not knowing what you’re doing and having people stare at you while you figure out what exercise to start with. Now, all of these things can be worked on and changed, I guarantee you, but while they loom in the distance, they can appear difficult and scary.

Now, let’s put that fear behind you. Take a piece of paper out and write the things are can happen while you do not follow through and stay where you are.

Here are some examples.

  1. You stay sedentary and inactive.
  2. Your health suffers.
  3. You feel bad about yourself.
  4. Because you feel bad about yourself, you go out less and your diet is terrible.
  5. You are burdened by regret for not starting and feel terrible about the place you’re in.

Now, if you take this list and put it behind you to drive you – this can be very powerful. If you do at some level would like to join a gym, then you are also adding a “want” to this list. Now, we have a fear behind us driving us and a want pulling us forward. These are 2 great allies that when joined together can really provide some serious breakthrough power. I hope you’ll find this helpful.

It’s Easy To Love (Or, Hate) Someone When You Have Never Met Them


Constantly I hear people saying they love this person, or this and that celebrity without ever even meeting, or knowing, them in person. It is easy to love and it is easy to hate someone you have never met. People are enthralled with complete strangers that do not know you exist. But, we do not know the names of our neighbors. When we take a walk and see someone walking towards us on the same side of the street we cross to the other side. Maybe we should start there, first.

You Won’t Know How Anything Will Be Until You Try It



Well, that is it in a nutshell. We just do not know how anything will go, or be, unless we try it, first. You see, our mind has a wonderful and very colorful mechanism of protecting us from new experiences because it wants us to stay safe and survive. Anything new is often filed under a big no. This is why we talk ourselves out of trying things that happen to be new experiences.

One amazing thing I have learned is that we have no idea whatsoever how the new experience will really make us feel. Sometimes you think hiking for an hour will suck, but you end up loving it. Sometimes going out to jam with new musicians feels very akward when you are home thinking about it, yet it proves to be one of your favorite experiences, ever.

This also goes towards people. Some of the people I did not really like from afar turned out to very cool people after all. And, the opposite proved true many times as well.

In the end, I just want you to consider that experiencing something is so much different than listening to your own voice of how things will be.

When You Start Something, Early Motivation Is Easy


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When you pick up a new hobby, start an exercise program or begin anything that is new, the early stage of motivation is built in. After all, there was “something” that made you want to start something new. It’s the honeymoon and you are excited. This period works for a few days, a week, couple of weeks, perhaps even longer and then it cools off. And, then it gets harder to progress.

This is where most people quit.

This is where most people start another project, another idea, or buy another guitar instructional program.

You have to realize that where most fail is the exact moment that you have to continue the daily progress to get better.

So what is the right thing to do when you start to lose interest in whatever you started to do? Foremost, you have to understand that unless you find a way to continue chieseling away day after day consistenly, you will never achieve great results in anything. Secondly, go back to why you wanted to start the new project in the first place. There had to be a reason for it. Did you buy a new guitar book because you wanted to be better, polish up your technique and be happier? As a side note, most of the things we do in life is beacuse at the end of it all we want happiness. And if that was your starting reason, don’t you still want that today? If so, then you simply have to tell the quitting voice to sit down. You continue to work. By doing this, you will see that your confidence in yourself will rise and it becomes easier and easier to stay on task in whatever you are doing.

Your Friends Won’t Give You A Record Deal



An interesting occurence happens in the music business. And, I am sure this applies to several other industries as well. I see many younger musicians trying to befriend and “get in” with anyone in the music business that they think can help them further their career. For the sake of clarity, it’s awesome to be genuinely friendly with people. It’s good for everyone around and true friends you can usually count on one hand, if you’re lucky. But, it is not awesome when being friends with someone is used as a means so you might get somewhere further.

It is important to remember that no one will give you a record deal or put you on the radio, or get you a gig simply because you are supposed to be some sort of friends. Reason is that you need to have something to offer first – a reason why you should be awared such thing. Friendship is not enough. As a matter of fact, I’d be much more interested in working on something that someone might want, see value in and want first and foremost. Then opportunities will come whether you are friends with someone in position to help you, or not. When people want something you provide, you’ll know.

Above is a simple advice, or observation. I write about it today because I see this scenario play out all the time.

Punctuality For Musicians

I recently read an article about punctuality and how a lack off has disbanded a cool Heavy Metal band. I just want to give you guys another reminder that being punctual is step-one to a successful functoning band, or organization. It is impossible to schedule your day successfully if you can not keep time. Being late also ruins others’ plans. The only people that will tolerate it in others, or amazingly enough sometimes even not, are other people who are never on time themselves. Truth is people are busy, they have things to do, and people with agendas have no time to sit around while twimbling their thumbs waiting for other musicians to show up.

If you are committed to a band, or task, this also goes to promp e-mail, text replies, etc.

The best way to work your time management on-point is work it backwards. By that, I mean you start with the arrival time that you need to be somewhere and deduct how long it will take you to get there. Then you add 15 minutes to travel for “un-usual” stuff that comes such as traffic, road work, flat tires.

Additional step, which is very overlooked and important, is to also give yourself time before your travel to get your “stuff” together. Need your guitar, cables, directions, coffee? Build whatever time you need to prep these things to go, or get them done the night before. What I often see is players knowing they got to be somewhere at 3’clock and they just rush like hell collecting their gear and hauling to the location in panic. Don’t do that. You crate a frenzy and when you show up, you bring a scattered energy to the people who are waiting for you. Don’t be that person.

Is every mega-rockstar super punctual? Suprising to you, most are! Some are not, but when we both sell gazillion records and employ 120 people, then you and I can rethink it then. Untill that time – know what’s important!

$3 Part That Threatened Life

My dad used to own a 16 foot long Tracker boat. Tracker is a company that makes pretty cool fishing boats. The Tracker was his pride and joy.

One day, while going for a boat ride/fishing trip we put the boat onto the water from a trailer. As the trailer dropped off the boat in the water, I noticed that the boat was floating a little too low above the water line. My dad shrugged it off and said all bass boats flow low. Okay, good enough. Or, so I thought.

As we take the boat out to the lake through the crates in the bottom of the floor I see a puddle of water creeping in. Then the realization – we got water all the way up underneath the boat! I tell my dad that we got water and he screams – Oh, shit, I forgot to put the cork in! So, I’m thinking to myself that a $3 dollar part can have us swim for our life if the boat submerges.

The story turned out ok as we just sprinted using the motor back to the shore, but you bet the boat was filled with water. Close call! And, my uncle’s phone fell into the lake while he jumped out trying to tie us onto something safe by the dropping dock.

Upon getting all the water out, my dad put the cork in and we went out onto the lake later that day. I never felt at ease in that boat ever again. Truth is, it was never the boat’s fault, but someone forgetting a small detail. What a lesson! Needless to say, this story lived with us in our family for a long time, lol.

How does this story relate? It’s in the small details! It is easy to get the big picture, while forgetting all the intricate small parts that are a part of it. This is the same as the guitarist who sets up his rig for a show and has a dead battery in the tuner and no spare. Or a pedal board that uses $250 guitar pedals that are connected with cheap connector patches that destroy the sound of the guitar rig. Examples are countless. You often see a local band that plays live and the banner is 3 feet wide with the corners are folding in. Or, how about the time when you car battery dies and you realize you have no jumping cable. It’s the small parts in big movements that destroy the goal – no matter how big the goal is. Remember the details.

It Took Me 11 Years To Edge Lawn Perfectly



I do most of the landscaping on my property myself due a few reasons. One – I enjoy the exercise, two – I get a sense of satisfaction when the lawn, shurbs and plants look great and three, I got tired very fast of fixing someone else’s poor landcaping jobs.

But, one item that gave me a lot of trouble was using a line edger to cut perfectly straight lines in the mulch and flower beds. My work never quiete looked great. It looked amateurish for a long time. Through error and just simply doing it week after week for 11 years, I can edge the lawn in perfect lines. Not a week, a month or a year. 11 years!

You get a sense of flow and know how when you repeat a task for over a decade while trying to improve the task each time. At this time I can out-edge most “pro” landcapers I see driving around.

I decided to share that because it can provide a good lesson to music students. You won’t learn to play the instrument or learn a challenging riff, or a song in a day. To perfect something it took me 11 years of once every two week action. Remember that.

Why Your Ego Is Stopping You From Learning The Guitar

Anything Worth Doing Is Worth Doing Badly. It is, my friends. In other words, we have to be willing to suck in the beginning if we are going to progress to the level of mastering something. Many people are not willing to be novices anymore. Young kids? Yes, they are kind of OK with that, because they are leaning new things all the time. They are young, lots of stuff is new. Early on in their life they are used to not being good at things. And, this is why they will bang on the guitar for months until it sounds good more often then not. Eventually, trough trail and error, they get the sound they want.

Now, adults are a different animal. Adults have done things, have seen things and they often expect that new things they learn to also come easy. They are afraid of getting their ego bruised if they suck. Not being good at anything first is actually step 1 on the journey to getting something right. You keep going. Just as a parent who does not give up on their child when they are learning to walk, you also try again. I have never seen anyone who could not play good basic guitar. I have never seen anyone whose fingers were too short, too long, too stubby, too whatever. And, I taught 1000s of people. Parents encourage their children to practice walking versus giving up because the first few steps were shaky.

So, remember, if something is hard to get right, that is a very necessary step to go through. I also call that success tax.

Choosing New Instrument Missions In The New Year



And, we are in 2021. What’s in a New Year? After all, our days continue, but the numbers on the calendar change. Exactly right. It is a reminder that 2020 is done, over with, good bye. It is time to pack up your green holiday stuff around the house, put in the basement or attic, and get your action right for 2021.

I prepared a little exercise for you. This is important. And, I really suggest you check it out.

I want you guys to get a single blank piece of paper, get a marker or a pen and write down 4 things you want to get done with your guitar playing this year. Of course, this can apply to any instrument. Be realistic. Give me items that contain a little stretch where it will take work, but ones that will give you a chance to accomplish them. I’ll give you a hint, for guitarists, one of them should be mastering notes on the fretboard. Then, what else? Write a song and put it on Spotify? Jam with a drummer at least 4 times? Learn all the Randy Rhoads modes so you can play them in your sleep?

And, lastly I want you to write down 3 things (or, a sentence) as to why you started to play the guitar in the first place? Was it because it made you feel good? Was it because it gave you a sense of doing something cool, or important with your time? Was it because you were able to find friends and others who “got” what you were about? There definitely are reasons as to why you strarted playing. What are they?

It is important to realign with your original mission as to why you started playing the instrument in the first place. Maybe you are doing it still doing it for the same reasons, or maybe the reasons have changed or drifted away? If you started to play as a way to relax after a long day at work and you still enjoy playing the guitar every night for a half hour, then maybe, you are still accomplishing your original goals. New licks will always challenge you, but knowing that you are doing what you originally set out to do will put things in perspective. And, probably enable you to learn new licks and techniques easier, too. There are many other benefits to doing this exercise.

And, yep, I do the same thing as well. I have a white board in my office where I plan out stuff. It really helps.