Ever since I started to play the guitar I have been fascinated with how our minds work, how life’s proven principles work and how that all ties into success on our instrument; whether it’s playing it, forging a carreer out of it, etc.
I don’t really believe that anyone is born confident or born unconfident. Several factors shape our confidence in anything. So I believe that Confidence (in anything) is made out of Courage, Commitment and Capabilities.
We can apply these 3 to anything anyone would feel Confident in. And, just for fun, I run examples of this for myself based on what I want to see in anyone’s confidence or why someone has achieved a goal of some sort that I feel inspired by.
Okay, the pieces.
Courage: Well, nothing happens unless Courage happens. Courage is doing something without knowing what is on the other side. It is buying a guitar at 45 (while your friends give you the eye) and not knowing if you can learn the damn thing in the first place. It is buying a house and saying that you’ll be able to pay for it for the next 30 years. It is asking a girl out not knowing if she’ll laugh at you or not. It is auditioning for a band not knowing if you are good enough.
Commitment is us saying to ourselves that you are in it for a long haul. There might be ups and downs, but you are hauling forward. No matter what happens you will figure the shit out and end up on the other side. The more you do it, the easier it gets.
Capabilities is you sharpening your sword. It is getting the necessary skills, wisdom and application of them in order for you to become the best at a task that you can be.
You see, we can’t have one without the other. You have to have all 3 to be Confident in something.
If you are commited to playing the guitar and work on your Capabilities, but are afraid to jam with people (lacking Courage), you will never be Confident in it.
Here’s a flip scrpit. Let’s say you are are always up to playing with anyone (Courage), you can keep constantly looking for friends to jam with (Commitment), but if you never develop your skills (Capabilities), you will never feel Confident, because who wants to jam with people when you feel like you can’t play anything.
Of course, this goes way beyond music and you can apply these 3 to being Confident in anything. I think this is a good lesson. Give it some thought. It is pretty amazing to see and learn lessons from the past as you start reconstructing your past moves. You can see where you dropped the ball and which item (Courage, Commitment or Capabilities) cost you success.